This seems to happen to me more frequently as I get older, and possibly a little shorter. I stand at a bar conspicuously displaying (if not waving) a twenty dollar bill at the bartenders that are hustling to and fro waiting on …other customers. Frequently, one of the men standing at the bar (there are almost always men standing at bars) will eventually wave down a bartender on my behalf. Apparently I am not (yet) invisible to men at bars…. unless they also happen to be the bartenders.
On a recent weeknight evening I met an old (as in I’ve known her for a long time) friend at a restaurant/bar. At that time of day the staff outnumbered the few customers. Despite the abundance of waitstaff, we seemed to be sitting in a blind spot of sorts; we eventually concluded we were not going to get any service despite the fact that several (non-busy) waitresses walked by us since our arrival. We walked to the bar to get drinks, where the bartender struck up a lengthy conversation with one of the kitchen workers between taking and fulfilling our drink requests. *sigh*
We sat with our drinks and decided we should probably eat something… which required a great deal of persistence in getting the actual attention of a waitperson so that we could order some food. The only person who actually made eye contact with us all evening was the very polite young man who delivered our food from the kitchen.
Yes, this was an extreme example of poor service, and is not my usual experience at this, or at other, restaurants. However, the bar ‘thing’ is not an anomaly…. it is the norm. I believe it is primarily because I am short; and bartenders at a busy bar will visually scan for patrons horizontally, versus vertically. Maybe I need a big hat with velcro at the top–to which I can afix a $20 bill along with my drink order.