I am the lucky beneficiary of circumstances of birth that were completely out of my control. My DNA has served me quite well; although better eyesight and an extra dose of growth hormones would have been nice–overall, I can’t complain.
As a white woman, I will never fully understand the experience of those with darker skin. I cannot shed the privilege that emanates from my pale skin, and to which I have been largely oblivious to most of my life. Although I didn’t ask for my white skin; I can no longer deny the relative power that it gives me.
Similarly, many men are unaware of the power and privilege inherent in their maleness; as they have never experienced the world as a woman. I recently listened to a fascinating Ted Talk by Paula Stone Williams, a Transgender woman who shared her experiences of living as both a man and a woman. Paula described the dramatic change in how people treated her after her transition. Spoiler alert–Paula experienced more hostility and less respect than she did as a man. (And…Yes, Paula is her real name– I chose to believe she would be tickled to be cited in a blog called paulaponders).
This is not a zero-sum game. If any of us are oppressed, we are all diminished. I believe we have a responsibility to use our relative privilege to advocate for others whose voices may otherwise be diminished or dismissed.
So – Be brave! Make a plan to speak up on behalf of yourself or someone else … the ‘next’ time. You will be glad you did.
Epilogue: I reached out to Paula Stone Williams via email to make her aware of this post, and to make sure she didn’t object; she couldn’t have been more gracious. It turns out she was the prior owner of the paulaponders.com url. Small world!!!